Goodbye My Love
by appalachiaprincess33
Summary: Rated T for Moretti Mouth Set post S4. Vic writes Walt a letter telling him how she feels abut him and how his actions affected her. Is it too late? Has Walt lost the one woman who loves him enough to call him out on his behavior?
1. Chapter 1

Walt walks into his office on a cool Wyoming morning, after a sleepless night in the cabin After briefing Ruby on last night's door-kicking-in scenario, he excused himself and went into his private office space. He needed to be alone. the masked kidnapper had taken Donna Sue away with him, leaving Walt battered and bereft.  
As he sat down in his chair, he noticced a white envelope with his name . Squinting, he recognized Vic's sloppy handwriting . Feeling his heart skip a beat, he tore open the envelope and pulled out a sheet of yellow legal paper. Leaning back in his deks chair, he began to read the letter.  
"Dear Walt:  
Consider this letter my two-week notice. I'm leaving Wyoming and returning to Philly to live with my mom for awhile until I can figure out what the hell I am supposed to do with my life. I'n NOT writing you this letter as a friend would, you pretty much fucked that up when you refused to tell me what the hell is between you and that doctor .No, this letter is just a courtesy letter to let you know that I'm DONE with Wyoming and I'm done with you.  
I don't hate you. Hell, it would be so much easier to hate you. But see, there is this one small problem...I love you , Walt.  
But you don't give a fuck about me. I have always loved you, ever since you almost DIED in that snowstorm in the mountains. Do you know the HELL you put me through that night? None of us knew if you were dead! In addition, since you were gone playing the hero, we were stuck dealing with those asshole FBI agents!  
I love you enough to NOT have taken advantage of the overnight situation in Arizona, not to have torn that door off its hinges and have my way with you? Yeah - I wanted to ravish you then and there, and to hell with 'convention' and the 'decorum' that you preach all the time.  
But I didn't, because to me you were no to bet just another conquest. I didn''t wanna screw with what friendship I'd thought we had by adding sex into the mix. Plus, at that time I was still a married woman. But damnit Walt, I love you! I didn't fuck you because I love you.  
I love you, and as much as it hurt, I was ok with you wanting to be with Lizzie. She , however, seemed to think that you loved me rather than her. Really, Walt, who could blame her for thinking that? I'd always hoped that her words would some day ring true, that you would realize that your feelings for me are more than that of a boss/subordinate. Clearly I was wrong, and I fucked up again.  
Clearly you only see me as a colleague... hell if I were your FRIEND, you would at least let me into your private world a little. But no, you cannot. You play the hero well, but won't allow yourself to be vulnerable. You were ok with me sleeping at your house to protect me from Gorski, but you cannot tell me if htere is a woman in your life. For God's sake, Walt, I wasn't asking for details, all I asked is if you and that doctor were an item. But apparently that is none of my business' But it's YOUR buisness to 'protect' me from both Gorski and !  
I love you, but I can no longer work with you. As a cop, I need to know that my partner trusts me in the field, and how can I work with a man who is so damn tight-lipped that he won't answer a direct question? Fuck that- if a suspect pulled that shit I know damn well you would throw their ass in the cell.  
Don't try to find me in Philly.  
I love you , Walt. I love you more than you'll ever know.  
Vic"  
The sherrif put the letter down, a single tear rolling down his stubbled cheek. Vic gone?  
" Damn," he said to no one. He folded the letter and carefully placed in in his shirt pocet, right aganst his heart.  
Ruby knoced on his door.  
" Come in" he says, quickly wiping the salty water off of his face.  
"Here is the missing persons paperwor for you to file for Dr Donna. Give it to me when you're done filling it out. Oh and Cady called, she wants to now if you've seen Vic. Apparently she didn't come home last night and Cady is worried"  
"Ok" Walt replied.  
Donna Sue's whereabouts werre the last thing on his mind right now. His attention was focused on Vic's letter, and he recalled the anggry words he and the blonde deputy exchanged in that alley .  
" Are you sick, Walter?" Ruby asked, concern lining her face  
"Nope." Walt replied. He surely isn't telling Ruby that Vic Moretti called him out on his bullshit and broke his heart al with a few strokes of handwriting.


	2. Chapter 2

A knock on the door interrupted Walt's filling out of the paperwork to list Donna as a missing person.  
" Morning , Walt" Ferg said.  
" Ferg, how good are you finding stuff on the computer?"  
Ferg shrugged.  
" Pretty good I guess. Whatcha need?"  
"I need a physical address for Vic's Mother. "  
"Why, and where is Vic?"  
"Thats what I will find out. " Walt answered his junior deputy.  
" Uh sure. I'll get right to it. "  
"Ferg, "  
" Yes, Walt?"  
"Give this missing person's report to Ruby. "  
Walt handed his deputy the completed paperwork and Ferg lefft the office.  
Walt reached inside his top desk drawer and pulled out a pad of yellow lined paper. Vic had always accused him of being a man of few words, but now is the time to tell the beautiful blonde cop exactly how he feels about her.  
He uncapped a ball point pen and begin to write.  
"Dear Vic  
I'm sorry that you feel that I don't trust you and I am sorry that i did not share more of my personal life with you.  
You're right , my job is to protect you and the last thing I wanted was for you to get entangled in my personal life.  
You see, Martha's murder was a result of MY actions, as was Cady's accident. After I almost lost my daughter and you and Sean were held hostage by Chance Gilbert, I knew I had to protect you. i could not protect Martha, almost could not protect Cady, and my best friend went to prison on account of me.  
Everyone I love gets hurt due to their association with me. Unscrupulous men such as Barlow Connolly will stop at nothiing to see that I am hurt, and the thought of somone harming you to get even with me scares me. Not only are you the best damn cop I've ever known, but you are my soul-mate, my twin flame. I HAD to protect you, and in the process of doing so, I hurt you.  
I love you, Vic. Please stay.  
Walt "  
He folded the paper and placed it in an envelope. As soon as Ferg found the correct address, he would get it in the mail . In the meantime, he had a missing person's case to deal with in addition to daily paperwork that comes with the job of Sherrif . He picked up the phone and dialed the Cumberland County Sherrif's office. He needed to borrow Eamon again. if anything was going to get done until Vic came home.  
to be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

Cady sat on the sofa in her house, an unopened envelope beside her and a hand-written letter in her hands. Quickly she texted her boss to let them know that she'll be late to work. Then, for what seemed like the hundredth time that month, she wished her dad would carry a cell phone as she waited for Ruby to nswer the phone.  
" Ruby, its Cady. Tell my Dad to call me or come over as soon as his schedule allows. Vic is gone"  
Ruby told her that she would pass the message on to Walt and Cady thanked her.  
She went into her small kitchen , filled a glass with cold tap water, and returned to to the couch Silently, began to reread te letter that Vic had left taped to the refrigerator for Cady to find.  
"Cady,  
I'm getting the hell outta Wyoming. Under the pillow in my bedroom you'll find another envelope with cash that I owe you for this month's rent. Thanks for everything, and I'm glad we've gotten to know each other better . I'm going to Philly to live with my mom and get my shit together. When I get there, I'll arrange for the rest of my stuff to be shipped from your house to my mom's place. I'll text you the address when it's time.  
The reason that I can't stay in Durant any longer is that I can't deny my feelings for your dad. As a matter of fact, I've been in love with him for a long time, and I was at one point brazen to thinat he might at least notice me a lttle bit. At first I admit that I had a ridiculous schoolgirl crush on your father  
After he and I exchanged a big embrace after the shoot-out with bat-shit crazy Chance Gilbert I was almost certain that your dad felt least a little bit of affection for me. But clearly I was wrong. Frankly, I doubt that he can love anyone more than he loves his job. Since your mom died, Walt has been searching for something to live for, and I think that he has found that in his work as Sherrif.  
Your dad and I have been through some hellish experiences together, including when you were in that car accident. Your dad blames himself for your accident, and sat by your bedside almost non-stop until you woke up. He may not love me, but he loves you. I was with him iin the hospital when you were unconscious, and I saw his devotion to you, his only child.  
He's a good man, and in spite of his flaws I thnk he is the best man I've ever known. {surely he is much more of a man than is my pussy of an ex-husband, Sean} Unfortunatuly not only can he not love me, , Walt Longmire apparently doesn't even trust me enough to share anything regarding his personal life.  
As much as I love your dad, I can no longer be his partner on the force. Right now it feels like I not only lost a friend, but also one of the most giftde lawmen I've known as my partner. He wants me to trust him, but he won't even trust me enough to clue me in on what goes on in his head. Aboraska County is lucky to have him, but I'm noture that doctor, or whomever catches your dad's eye next, can truly KNOW him. Dr Donna might be able to get into his head, but she'll never get into his heart.  
Take care of him for me, Cady. God knows I tried to take care of him, but I failed miserably at that task.  
Thanks,  
Vic"  
Cady put the letter down, grabbed her purse and car keys, then walked out her front door. Driving rt. to work, she wondered what had transpired betqeen her father and her roommate recently.  
She knew her Dad has been secretive, even for him, lately but she also knew better than to pry. After the incident with Chance Gilbert, she noticed how Vic and her father looked at each other and wondered what the story was between them. When she trie to talk with her godfather, Henry, all he would say on the matter was " It is what it is".  
Cady shook her head as she drove towards her office. Her day at work was already full, and she really did not want to deal with the drama caused by her roommmate as of late.  
Her cell phone rang. Pulling over to the side of the road, she answered it.  
"Cady Longmire"  
"Punk, its Dad. Vic's gone can you get over here today?'  
Cady checked her Seiko watch, a gift on her last birthday from Branch.  
"Can this wait til this afternoon? I'm already late and I've a full day on the res with work. How about supper at the Pony ? My treat this time," she said.  
"See you there, Punk. " Walt confirmed.  
" Love you, Dad" cady said before she ended the call. and put her cell phone back in her purse.  
Her already long day was about to get much longer.  
to be continued...


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note ... the song lyrics are from " Say Something" by A Great Big World. I do not own the song nor the lyrics, but it seems perfect for what Walt is going through now...**

Walt started at Vic's note in his hand, willing the tears to not fall as he waited for Cady to meet him for supper. It had beenn al long day, and his department has a lead on Donna Sue's kidnapper. Not that it matters much to Walt, as there is only one blonde who has his heart. Sadly, she thinkks he doesn't love her and decided to move across the country.  
Henry Standing Bear came up to the table where his best friend sat alone.  
" Good evening, Walt. Shall I get you your usual tonight?"  
" Yup"  
Henry's dark eyes clouded as he regarded the friend who is more than a brother to him.  
"What is wrong, Walt? And do not tell me "nothing'. You and I both know that I can read you like a book."  
"She's gone, Henry." Walt replied, staring at the table, where Vic and he had meet for endless chats, both on and off-duty.  
""Who is gone?"  
"Vic. Left this morning. She wrote me a letter."  
Henry gave his best friend a pat on his shoulder.  
"I am sorry. But she will come back. I will go get your beer"  
Henry turned around and went twards the bar, just as Walt spotted Cady entering the building.  
"Hi Dad, " his daughter greeted him with a kiss on the cheek**  
Cady ordered her supper and Walt ordered another beer.  
Walt handed his daughter the note from Vic.  
"She left this on my desk,"  
Cady took the piece of paper from her father's hands and begun to read it silently. Henry came by and brought Walt his beer and a diet Coke for Cady.  
"Do you need anything else? the Cheyenne man inquired  
"Need Vic back," Walt whispered  
"That I cannot do, " his best friend said.  
Cady set the letter down and took her father's rough hands in hers.  
"I'm so sorry, Dad. Truth is , she left me a note as well. I had no idea thaht she plannd to leave until this morning. Most of her things are still in the spare bedroom at my house. '  
"Oh" Walt said.  
Cady squeezed her father's hands and looked him in the eye.  
" Can I please ask you a question?'"  
Walt took a sip of his beer.  
"Can ask"  
"Do you want me to help you find Vic? And when I do, will you promise me that you'll smooth this mess you made with her? She loves you, Dad. But your actions these past few weeks hurt her. Vic acts all tough on the outside but she's vulnerable. As Vic would say , you 'fucked up'."  
Walt nodded. he knew his daughter was telling him the truth.  
"So how do I fix this?" he asked, as Henry brought their food.  
Cady picked up her fork and put a mouthful of fried chicken in her mouth. Sh washed her food down with a swig of diet Coke.  
"Take some time off and go to Philly. Ferg and Eamon can handle things at work for now. Clearly you're not gonna be able to be fully present at work until Vic comes home. "  
"Ferg hasn't found her mom's address yet," Walt said.  
Cady smiled and handed her dad her cell phone  
"I have all Vic's mother's contact information at my house Call the airport and make reservations to fly to Philly tomorrow. Make the reservations and I'll give you the address , phone number ect tomorrow when I drive you to the airport. "  
Walt dialed the nuber of the Aboroska County Airport, and by the time Cady had paid the bill for their meal, had booked himself a flight to Philadelphia.  
He and his daughter walked into the cool night air. After saying their goodbyes and making arrangements for Cady to pick him up at the airport early in the morning, Walk walked to his Bronco , turned the key and drove home to his cabin.

Say something, I'm giving up on you  
I'll be the one if you want me to  
Anywhere I would've followed you  
Say something, I'm giving up on youAnd I... will swallow my pride  
You're the one that I love  
And I'm saying goodbye

Rain started to fall, so he turned on the windshield wipers. Yes, he should have said something to Vic that day in the alley. And Cady is correct , he'd seen the blonde deputy's vunerable side many times-nwhy had he not just SAID SOMETHING when Vic confronted him with the truth about how things between them were more than friendly. "I'm not letting you go that easy, Vic Moretti" he promised himself as he maneuvered the Bronco away from town and towards his cabin. The main roaf leading out of Durant was abandoned, and Walt was grateful for the solitude.

to be continued...


	5. Author's Note

Author's note...

I am sorry about the typos. I shall be more careful in the future . Thanks for bringing this to my attention. Thanks also for readiing and reviewing. I'm going on vacation next week, so I shall update this story when I can.

All comments are read and appreciated. But please, remember that each of us on FF has our own "Longmire" Universe.


	6. Chapter 5: Vic

**I edited this chapter , hopefully getting rid of the typos and adding a bit more detail.**

 **Update: I am in the process of writing the next installment, but it will probably be tow days before I can publish it here.**

 **Thanks for reading and reviewing!**

 **#LONGLIVELONGMIRE**

Vic Moretti opened her eyes, At first she did not know where she was, so she rubbed her eyes and looked around. The she remembered, and she felt her heart sink into her toes.  
Walt. the letter, the phone call to her mother, followed by hitching a ride to the Absoraska County Airport. Waking up in childhood bedroom, she felt more deafeated than she had ever felt thus far in her ilfe.  
" Shit, I'd slept hard. I forgot that I arrived in Philly last night, " she said to herself as she stretched. Her neck hurt from yesterday's ordeal of sitting on airplanes and in seats at airport gates.  
The blonde cop got out of bed, pulled a sweatshirt over her sports bra and panties, and made her way to the guest bathroom of her mother's house.  
Splashing her face with warm water, Vic looked in the mirror. Her gold-flecked brown eyes were rimmed with puffy redness, and she still worse last night's smudged mascara. She soaped a washcloth and scrubbed her face - wiping away the evedence of her angst. Vic has spent the entre flight from Dallas { Who the hell has to go to Dallas to get to Philadelphia anyway?} to Philly bawling and blowing her nose. At one point her tears had attrected the attention of her seatmate.  
" You ok , Miss?" the older gentleman has asked.  
" Do I fucking LOOK like I'm ok?" she replied rudely.  
Vic brushed her teeth, ran a comb through her messy blonde hair and tied it in a high ponytail.  
Padding back to her childhood bedroom, she found her favorite pair of worn jeans and her Police Academy t-shirt that she'd had since her training. Searching for her running shoes, Vic saw some photographs of herself and Walt. Instictively she ignored her shoes and reached for the photos.  
She wanted to be mad at Gorski for spying on her. Yet she could not help feeling some sort of gratitude towards him for taking theses photos when she and Walt were overnighting in Arizona . They were all she had left of her partnership with Walt.  
The first picture showed the two of them enjoying a beer together off-duty. In the photo, Vic's hair cascaded over her shoulders as she leaned into Walt with a shy smile on her face. Walt never drank on-duty, but the two of them had shareed many of off-duty bottles of Ranier at The Red Pony.  
Vic sat on the bedroom floor and looked at the next photo. This one showed her and Walt in the hotel lobby checking in for the night. Both of them stood together at the clerk's desk , their legs touching slightly.  
Vic closed her eyes and allowed herself to get lost in the memory.  
"There you go, Mr Longmire," the motel clerk said, handing the sherrif one hotel key.  
"Need two rooms," Walt mumbled.  
" Pardon, sir?" the clerk asked  
" WE NEED TWO ROOMS!" Vic yelled a lttle too loudly.  
" Sorry, miss. Be right back. "  
Walt turned to Vic, an exasperated look on his handsome face.  
" No need to yell at him"  
" But he didn't hear you," Vic replied. " Not everyone is used to your mumbling"  
The clerk returned with two room keys and handed one to each of them. They walked together out the front doors of the motel lobby and up the creaking wrought-iron stairs. The corridor smelled like old garbage and vomit . The nighttime air felt chilly, and Vic stuffed her hands into her jacket pocket.  
" Be careful where you step," Walt said as he steadied her by placing a hand on her waist.  
"I take it you've done this before?" she said kiddingly.  
"What?"  
" You know, snuck around a seedy motel with a female collegue in the middle of butt-fucking Egypt, " Vic teased.  
Walt was silent, and Vic realized she might have stepped on a nerve.  
"Geeze, Walt, I'm KIDDING!"  
" "Not funny,"  
They stopped at the two rooms that matched the numbers engraved on their key cards.  
" This is me" Vic said as she effortlessly swiped the kep card , and opened the door.  
"And this is me," he answered.  
Loud knocking on the bedroom door snapped Vic out of her reverie.  
"Victoria Moretti, get your lazy ass outta the bed, " her mother's voice bellowed.  
"Coming" Vic yelled at the disembodied voice coming from the bedroom door.  
She threw the photos in her open suitcase.


	7. Chapter 7 Walt

**This gets off-canon and a bit AU here... please read and review. I am still trying to make sense of the quagmire that is S4.**

Walt looked at the Departing Flights screen , seeing that his flight from Dallas to Philadelphia was delayed for at least two hours.  
" Shit, " Walt said.  
he was tired and cranky, and for the first time in his life, he wishes he had a cell phone. Last Christmas, cady had offered to buy him a cell phone and a service plan, but he had declined. At any rate, it felt good to stretch his long les after sitting cramped in the back of the airplane. he hated flying, and he hated how crowded in sitting in airpanes made him feel  
He looked around for a mens' room.  
Finding one, he took a pee, washed his hands, and returned to the busy corridor in the Dallas-Fort Worth airport. Looking around, he saw a directory kiosk which told him where to find a place to sit and nurse a beer. As he walked back towards his gate area, he noticed a sports bar that did not look too crowded.  
All around him, travellers were busy with their cell phones. Different sporting events played on the various television sets that surrounded the bar area. Walt purused the drink menu he found on the table and saw that they served Ranier on tap.  
A cute blonde middle-aged waitress with big hair and even bigger boobs sauntered up to Walt's table.  
" Hi sugar, what can I get ya?" she drawled.  
"Just a Rainier ," he replied.  
"Okayyyy, how 'bout some fries or wings to go with the beer? They're real good,"  
" Just the beer," he said, as he reached into his back pocket to pull out his wallet.  
" Not much of a talker, are ya, Cowboy? Be right back."  
Walt removed his hat and ran fingers through his hair. he did not know what he was planning to say to Vic, and he knew damn well he deserved to lose his best deputy. Martha used to always tell him that he tended to alienate anyone that tried to get too close to him.  
"Walter, you need some more friends. Besides me and Cady, the only other person you seem to want to see outside of work is Henry. Join a book club or something. " martha had said once.  
" Can read at home just fine" he had replied.  
Walt sighed and put his hat back on his head. He knew that, iin spite of his efforts to keep Vic at arms length, she did manage to make him care about her as more than a deputy.  
The waitress interrupted his thoughts by clanking down a mug of beer.  
"Sure I can't get ya nothin' else, Sweetie?" she asked  
" Nope" he handed her the cash and she left him to his thoughts.  
"You think too much, Walt." he has lost the number of times that hsi late wife told him that, usually out of exasperation. His thoughts get hin into truble, such as that time he and Vic were stuck overnight in Arizona, eating supper and drinking beer at a bar .  
Vic had been discussing the case with him, al the while putting her luscious lips on his longneck Rainier bottle. She had made a joke about ' bad girls' while widening her god -fecked green eyes. Walt remembered reisting the urge to caress her hair and kiss her hard.  
He shook his head, grateful that he managed to quell his feelsings for Vic before they got out of hand. The last thing he and his department needed right now was more gossip. Donna Sue, in her attractive femaleness, distracts him enough as to not ruin the department with another scandal. He likes Donna Sue, and is attracted to the beautiful psychiatrist, but the other woman is not Vic.  
He pounded a fist on the table as he recalled his own stupidity. She's pissed at him. He's had to deal with Vic's temper severa times, but usually her wrath was aimed at somone else. he had no clue what he would say to her when they saw each other next.  
" And rightfully so. You really hurt her feelings, and this time she probably won't come back" Martha's voice whispered into his imagination.  
Martha's voice continued " You make it hard for anyone but me to love you, Walter. Henry has known you since childhood, and you are and always will be Cady's dad . But don't think Vic will wan to return to your department after what you said to her in that ally.  
He took a huge gulp of beer and signaled to the waitress that he wanted a refill.  
She came over with a fresh glass of Ranier.  
" Thanks, " he mumbled, taking another swing of beer.  
he did not want to remember how badly he had hrt Martha all those years ago. He'd been a selfish bastard, and Martha had taken him back. But he doubted that his feisty, beautiful, fould-mouthed deputy would ever fully forgive him.


	8. Chapter 8:Walt

**Sorry to make you al wait so long, but I have been out of town. Here is what I have so far... Walt is doing some MAJOR 'fessing up during this flight. Please read and review.**

After two hours of hanging around the Dallas-Fort Worth Airport , Walt found himself sitting in a window seat on a plane heading for Philadephia. He took off his hat and sighed. Deftly he secured his seat belt arond his slender waist. He flexed his feet, after hours of sitting idle he yearned to walk around.  
Vic. He had conflicting feelings about making this ardous journey. He did not want to beg Vic's forgiveness, but he knew that if he chose to let her go, he woud regret that choice for the rest of his life. Walt is a man who is used to pulling confessions from others, rarey in his adult life has he had to confess his own wrongdoings.

He wanted Vic in a way that was different from the way he desired both Donna and Lizzie. What he felt for Vic went beyond te physical, something about his younger deputy's foul mouth and hell-on-wheels personality excited him. She frustrated him daily, and knew exactly how to piss him off, but at the end of the day he could not imagine his life, or his department wiithout Vic.  
He feared that it was too late.

Martha was right, his actions twenty years ago almost cost him both his marriage and his career . Martha forgave him, even though deep down he knew he did not deserve her mercy. He and his late wife had done their best to keep Cady in the dark about their marriage troubles, but Ruby knew , and probably has never forgiven him for what he did to Martha.

He closed his eyes , put the seat back as far as it would go in the crampedd airplane. The Captain came on the intercom and Walt ignored the safety briefing.

He closed his eyes , put the seat back as far as it would go in the crampedd airplane, and soon was sound asleep.


	9. Chapter 9 Vic

**I finally figured out where and when Walt and Vic will meet... please read and review. Thanks for the feedback.**

Vic ended the call wth her old boss at the Philadelphia Police Department.  
Tomorrow she had an interview, " just a formality" with her former boss. She would not be working in Homicide, instead she's interviewing for a place on the Special Victims Unit team.  
She returned to her childhood bedroom and stuffed a red mailia folder into her computer bag. When Sean announced he was taking the job in Austrailia, she had updated her resume, and in hindsight felt grateful that she did not need to bother with that tedious task today. As one of only four cops in an entire county, she cannot say that her time in Wyoming had been totally wasted. At least she can thank the Butt-Fucked-Egypt Wyoming County or giving her more skils that she can use in the fied.  
She slung the bag over ne shoulder, and as an afterthought, grabbed her firearm from its place beside her bed.  
" Shit, I'll need to airmaiil this piece back to Wyoming," she said to herself as she made her way downstairs.  
" Victoria, are you hungry?" her mother called from the TV room.  
" Nope" Vic answered. " Got stuff to do today, Mom."  
" You be home for supper?"  
" Shit, Mom, I dunno. I'll text you!" Vic yelled, before remembering that her mother does not own a cell phone.  
Slamming the front door loudly behind her, she quickly walked to the nearest bus stop. Sticking her hands in her pockets, she thought about how Walt might have reacted to getting her note. She wondered if he's even give her a second thought or just expand his deputy search to find two new cops instead of just one.  
"Not my problem, asshole" she said, as if Walt could hear her back in Wyoming.  
The bus came and she quickly climbed aboard, grateful to have public transportation again.

She had never gotten accustomed to the idea of driving everywhere, and as anyone who has ridden with her knows, she is still a horrible driver. No, she won't miss drving those dusty backwoods Wyoming roads.  
Vic stared out the window and remembered signing the divorce papers that Sean has so callously had served to her at work.

" Vic, I want you to stay, " Walt had said that day.  
Damn, she'd been a fool. Granted, her marriage to Sean was over with or without Walt, but how could she have been so stupid as to think that Walt would care for her? This was the second time in her life that she'd made the mistake of falling for a superior officer, and te second time that said officer had stomped on her heart.  
Never again, she vowed.  
Her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she'd left her mom's place without breakfast. A quick search on her cel phone revealed a small sandwich shop near where she was heading. Vic paid her bus fare and stepped off the bus and into the coo air of a sandwich shop.  
After a quick look at the menu board above the counter , she ordered a classic Philadelphia cheesesteak sandwich and beer. When her food was ready she picked it up at the counter near the cash register, paid for her lunch, and found a seat near a window facing the street.  
Biting into the deliciousness that is an originally Philly Cheesesteak sandwich, Vic contemplated Walt.  
Right now she would be happy to never see his face or hear his voice again, not after the time in the alley . Vic knew that in order to move on, she had to put some physical and emotional distence between herself and her former boss.  
A quick glance at her watch showed her that she had an hour left before her confession time with Father Mike down at St Patrick's Catholic Church.  
Vic shrugged. She has not been to Confession in years, and she heard the priest's surprise when she'd called the parish office this morning and asked for the Sacrement of Reconciliation. She''s not a practicing Catholic, but she needed to air her pain to somone, and Father Mike has been the parish priest at St Patrick's since Vic's turbulant teen years. when she looked up ther pariish contact information online, she felt grateful to see his namestil listed as Rector.  
He'll probably tell me I fecked up again,she thought to herself as she added more salt to her French fries. Popping one in her mouth and wiping her fingers with a paper napkin, she looked at her phone.  
Shit, if she is to make it on time to her appointment with Father Mike, she needed to leave now.  
Checking to make sure her firearm is stil secure in its holster, she rose and left the sandwich shop.  
to be continued...


	10. Chapter 10

**SLOWLY, we will find out what Walt did to Martha. I'm writing this as it comes to me, and with limited editing. Please be patient. Thanks.**

Walt paid the cab driver, got his backpack out of the seat next to him, and stepped out of the car. he decided that he did not want to take a cab all the way to Vic's mother's house. Tired and disoriented, he looked up at the sky amd noticed a rain cloud.  
" Shit," he cussed under his breath as he unfolded a paper street map of Philadelphia.  
The wind picked up , rufling the map in Walt's already unsteady hands. Squinting in the low late-theaftenoon light, he tried hard to mtch the street address on the paper to where he found himself at the moment. He needed either Henry or Ferg, as he knew tracking never was his strong suit. Large rain drops bounced off the rimof his hat. Franticly he lookked arund for a pace t sit unti the storm passed.  
A few yards ahead of him was a large Gothic Revival Catholic church. Quickening his pace, he made his way to the heavy front doors to the nave, finding them open. Shutting the doors behind him, he heaved a sigh of relief .  
When his eyes adjusted , he noticed that a light above the main altar area illuminated the cavernous nave. Setting his wet backpack on the floor, Walt entered the church. The only sounds he hears were the sounds of his wet boots squishing on the marble tiled floor.  
A Catholic priest kneeled in front of the altar, appearing to be praying silently. Walt took off his wet hat and awkwardly sat down in the front pew. He hasn't been in a church since Branch's funeral, but suddenly he felt the ned to confess everything.  
" Walt, let the priest help you forgive yoursef " Martha's voice whispered in his ear.  
He shook his head. As much as he knew that he NEEDED t confess to someone about what happened twenty years ago, he did not know how to begin . He needed a drink.  
" You do NOT need a drink, Walt" Drinking got you into these messes in the first place. When the reverend is through praying, just ask to talk with him. I know talking isn't your strength, but do it anyway. "  
The priest rose from his kneeling and regarded the Wyoming lawman with curiosity.  
"Can I help you, son?" asked the priest.  
" I , uh, need to confess something..." Walt replied. His mouth fet like he had swallowed cotton.  
" Come this way," the priest instructed . Walt followed t black-clad figure to a small confessional .


End file.
